Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Parenting - Reversing the Coin?

Thoughts from the heart #2

Were you brought up with stern parents, who made you afraid of them?

 As you now have your own children, take a look at how you are parenting? if by chance you find you doing the same things as your parents did, it is not too late to be different. The thought just came to me even as I reflect, and had to share. 

Do you give orders? are your children seen and not heard? Do you find it too hard to discuss and find out if they have opinions? 

Assessing your attitude towards your children, think about how you may be responding to authority on the job. Do you resent your team leader? Do you carry out your duties with resentment? How is your relationship with your team leader? Could this be because you resented the type of parenting you had in your childhood?

Assess your parenting style, if they mirror your childhood days, change and improve so your children can be well rounded with opinions and not grow up fearful, and afraid or resent authority, or repeat the same parenting style causing the cycle to continue.

Just sharing as the thoughts flow.


Saturday, September 10, 2016

PARENTING - the other side of the coin

Thoughts from the heart #1

We are always writing and reading about good parenting, but as I have been observing and listening to some parents wondering why the relationship between them and their child/children cannot be like they want it, and I also hear children complained about what it was like growing up, I decided to  share my heart.

As parents we want the best for our children. Because of that we try to give them the best education, send them to Church (unfortunately some of us do not go). Wanting to be so good we put them in a mold. Most times the mold shapes just like us. Do as I say; speak as I do; go where I send you; eat what I give you; love me more than you love others, among other things.

We give them no choice, no chance to say how they feel, they are not allowed to say what they like or don’t like, and sometimes our words are so sharp that we wound them for life. With that they become withdrawn, discouraged and sometimes very rebellious.

Yes, some of us may have failed, but it is never too late to see where we went wrong, ask for forgiveness and bring restoration to the broken parent, child relationship.

We can never change the pass but we can change today and what is to come. Our children are waiting for us to bring that peace and restoration they so longed for.

Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.

Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not make your children resentful. Otherwise, they'll become discouraged.

~Winsome~ - Counselling Psychologist

September 10, 2016

Tuesday, August 30, 2016


Most of us have gone through or going through some challenging times in our lives. During times like these we find it hard to come up with a solution to the problems we face. The answers are no where in sight. We pray, we quote scriptures, but it seems the challenges just won't go away.

It is during these times that God is at work, He is is working all things for our good. I sometimes find myself quoting Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. My expectation and hope would feel as if they were at the peak, but still the challenges seem to linger.

I recently was reminded that when God reassured the children of Israel in Jeremiah 29:11 that He had their interest at heart. They were in exile, but He would bring redemption. Even as we face our "exile" experience, be encouraged that God has a plan and we will be redeemed in the time and way He sees fit. 

But before God shared his promise of redemption to the Children of Israel He told them to seek the peace and the prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper. (Jeremiah 29:7)
Our change will come by persevering through our challenges, not running away from them. 
Trust God He is working it out for your good and for His glory.